There it is on the kitchen calendar, between the dentist and giving the dog a flea tablet, so it must be true. Yet still I keep checking the ticket just in case I imagined it.
Here we go, sure enough. Iain Dale: All Talk with Nicola Sturgeon MSP, Thursday, 10 August, 2023, 13.00, Pentland Theatre, Edinburgh.
Yes, that would be the same Nicola Sturgeon MSP who was arrested, questioned and released without charge as part of a major, ongoing police investigation into SNP finances.
In the circumstances, you might well have thought the last place the former First Minister, a solicitor by training, would want to be is before a live audience, being asked questions on anything under the Edinburgh sun by an interviewer who collects political scalps the way others bag Clubcard points.
But what do civilians like me and you know of showbusiness and its ways? We are talking about the Fringe after all, the place where politicians come to show their more human, hopefully funny, sides. Like that old trouper Marx almost said, history repeats itself, first as tragedy, second as farce, and finally as a Fringe show.
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The artist formerly known as Scotland’s First Minister is not alone in her desire for the August spotlight. Her Festival diary is relatively empty compared to what her predecessor Alex Salmond has planned.
His show, The Ayes Have It, running from August 4-13, invites audiences to play their part in “feisty parliamentary-style debate on the great issues of the day”. Among the cast of what seems like thousands are Mr Salmond, natch, David Davis, former Secretary of State; John Bercow, ex-Speaker of the Commons; Henry McLeish, another former First Minister; Joanna Cherry KC MP, and Mick Lynch, RMT general secretary. Chuckle brothers and sisters, every one. Here in Glasgow we can only pray the show tours, preferably somewhere far away.
Do not worry if you cannot make the Sturgeon or Salmond dates. There is always the latest performer in the role of First Minister, Humza Yousaf, talking to Iain Dale on August 11. With lots of new material to share from his independence prospectuses, a hilarious and informative time will be had by all.
You may wonder why any politician bothers with the Fringe. It’s summer, why not holiday with their nearest and dearest away from the capital crowds? Some have more time on their hands than others. The rest, that includes you Mr Yousaf, can probably tell themselves that appearing on the Fringe is simply politics by other means.
There has long been an association between the two worlds. Many a future member of the ruling classes has ventured north at one point to try their hand at performing. If politics didn’t scoop them up the BBC usually did.
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Today a festival goer can hardly move for the number of stand-ups doing political routines, the more vicious the better. Do not listen to those who say these performances are of no consequence. Who do you think got rid of Boris if not the late-night lads and lassies at the Assembly Rooms?
It was only a matter of time before politicians cut out the middlemen and staged their own shows, or appeared as headline acts for others. In most cases they are motivated by sheer ego. Basically old hams at heart, they are unable to resist the roar of the grease paint and the smell of the cheesy chips.
For others, Edinburgh in August offers something far more important and lasting. It is a showcase, a chance to display one’s talents to any potential employers and commissioning editors. With a General Election on the way it has never been more important to get one’s face out there.
Appearing on the Fringe has another purpose for politicians, one that is rarely, if ever, spoken about. It is a sensitive subject but we are all grown-ups here. For some, taking part in the Fringe is a form of healing, an opportunity to release steam, work through concerns, and return to the fray refreshed.
In hindsight, we can perhaps see some of this going on last year with Nicola Sturgeon. She had a very busy Edinburgh in 2022, talking about herself or interviewing others, including Brian Cox. The star of Succession told her that getting older had its benefits, among them the freedom to say and do what he wanted. “I just don’t give a **** any more, you know what I mean?” To which the then First Minister replied: “I can’t wait to reach that stage.”
At another event she hinted that the SNP might go into the next Scottish Parliament election with a new leader. The signs were there. Here was a woman looking to change her life, shake the kaleidoscope of fate and see where the pieces landed.
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If only we had listened more carefully, paid closer attention to the signals. As it was, the news of her resignation came clean out the blue and left the chatterati looking like absolute pillocks. I think I speak for the entire country when I say that can never be allowed to happen again.
So this year let us be alive to the possibilities of the Fringe and its impact on politics. Take Mr Salmond’s show, The Hills Have Eyes, or whatever its proper title (please don’t make me go on the site again to check, I beg you). By inviting students from two city schools, Craigmount and Boroughmuir, the event will show politics at its big-tent, welcome-all-ages best.
As you can see from the line-up, Eye of the Tiger welcomes participants of different stripes, all determined to get along for the greater good. What a fine example to set. And I bet the fifth and sixth years wipe the floor with the older crowd. ‘Mon the pupils. Show them how it is done.
One day, when the Festival is over and summer’s warmth has long given way to winter’s chill, we can only hope that the lessons of the Fringe will be remembered by those who took part.
Indeed, if all politics was conducted in the same spirit as exists in Edinburgh in August what a different position Scotland might be in today. No falling out, no heated demos, no egg-throwing. One big happy family, that’s what we would be. Like the song says, wouldn’t that be loverly?
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