SHOCK and horror are much overused words in the media. But for the story I’m about to tell, they’re the only fitting terms.

Last night, a reader from the central belt contacted me, forwarding a letter from Scottish Gas. The letter said that even if this reader used zero gas - no gas whatsoever - they could expect a bill for £136.04. ‘Shock and horror’ seems appropriate, yes?

To be clear: this reader will pay for the privilege of not using gas. The letter reads as follows: “Here’s what you spent on gas. Based on your use from 23 August 2021 to 22 August 2022, your costs for the last 12 months were £0.00. Next year, the same amount of energy would cost you £136.04.”

It adds, with grim irony: “Could you pay less? Switching to a cheaper tariff you could save £46.70 by changing from pay as you go and switching to fixed.”

So if the reader switches, they’ll still pay £89.34 for using no gas at all. We’re now in realms of madness when it comes to the ‘cost of greed’ crisis.

The reader explains they cut out using gas and “got the meter capped and bought electric heaters and use the electric immersion for water”. The bill, they say, shows just “how screwed the system is … It’s illustrating exactly what’s going on … I just think the companies are corrupt and greedy.”

Get this analysis directly to your inbox by signing up to The Herald's political newsletter, Unspun, for FREE and unrivalled political analysis in your inbox every day at 6pm.

Sign up here.

Scottish Gas is the name used by British Gas when it operates north of the border. It’s part of the energy giant Centrica. For the first half of this year, Centrica reported operating profits of £1.3 billion. It reinstated its dividend, handing investors £59 million. The previous year Centrica made operating profits of £262 million.

Our lives - yours, mine, everyone who’s not so wealthy that they’re safely beyond fear and ruin - are going to be crushed. Just this week, the annual Minimum Income Standard study found that the cost of energy will strip many Britons of basic dignity this winter.

It’s not just that we’ll have to give up little luxuries like Netflix, meals out, a holiday, cinema trips, or a new pair of jeans. Many of us will soon be unable to afford the fundamental necessities of life. Some of us will soon be unable to afford deodorant, toothpaste - toilet paper.

What’s about to happen - while the Tory Party does nothing - will be the humiliation of Britons in their millions.

There’s some sort of ghastly foreshadowing to the rotten stench of bins unemptied across Scotland, and sewage filling the seas around England. We may all be stinking soon - unable to heat the water for a bath, too poor to buy anti-perspirant while we sweat in jobs with wages that cannot meet even the basics that dignity demands.

You don’t need me to tell you what the solution is - any of us with a brain knows it’s an immediate end to the price rises, energy costs reduced drastically, Ofgem reformed, energy companies subjected to windfall taxes, and government support - paid for by our taxes, remember - which ensures everyone is financially able to cope.

However, nor do you need me to tell that hope is fading fast. Ruin is already here, as that reader’s bill shows. The SNP simply talks, and the Tories just don’t care. We’re on our own. How we chose to respond to political failure will either show the British people to be submissive slaves, or capable of taking the fight into our own hands and reordering a society abandoned by its political class.

The Scottish Gas projection for the reader is a ’standing charge’. When Ofgem sets the price cap unit rate, it also sets standing charges and these are applied even if there is no usage.