The hard problem
OVERHEARD in a pub in Glasgow’s West End by reader Don Murphy.
Two student types were having a drink.
One of the young chaps appeared crestfallen as he gazed gloomily into his Guinness.
“What’s the matter, dude?” asked his concerned pal.
Not looking up from his pint, the first fellow described his predicament succinctly, when he said: “Reality keeps ruining my life.”
Modern romance
GLASGOW is a chic city, where the natives dress memorably.
Reader Laura Mason was in the Sainsbury’s car park in Muirend when she spotted a young lady proudly wearing a T-shirt with the words emblazoned across the front "I Love Me".
Says Laura: “It gave me a great idea for a rom com movie.
“A girl glances at herself in the bathroom mirror, falls head over heels in love, then lives happily ever after… with herself.”
Adds Laura: “It’s not a particularly complex plot or especially entertaining. But, boy, would it be cheap to make as it would only require one actor.”
I Spy
MOVIE buff Barry Cooper from Shawlands enjoys a film evening every Sunday, when he invites his 14-year-old grandson round to watch a classic of the silver screen.
Last week Barry introduced the youngster to the world of James Bond, when they watched Sean Connery in Goldfinger.
Afterwards, Barry was eager to know what the lad thought of the classic spy flick.
The young chap thought long and hard, a puzzled expression on his face.
Then he said: “I don’t get it. Why is it better shaken, not stirred?”
Barking-mad books
HAVING discovered that dogs are being allowed in Edinburgh libraries, the Diary is trying to figure out what books the mutts are perusing. (Or should that be paw-rusing?)
George Crawford from West Kilbride says: “I hear that some of the more erudite canines are reading To the Doghouse by Virginia Woof.”
Talking balls
A LONDON pal of reader Steve Talbot is a passionate football fan who travels the world watching many of the great teams play.
Recently this chap flew north to visit Steve, who suggested they go and watch a local footy match.
The pal shuddered, then cruelly said: “I don’t think so. Watching Scottish football would be like going to watch an am-dram musical when you don’t have a kid in the show.”
The bends
DYNAMIC reader Anna Stewart gets in touch to say: “I haven't tried yoga. But I have tried bending over to pick up my keys, so I'm pretty sure I'd hate yoga.”
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