As I get older, something that I increasingly struggle with is what to buy friends and family as gifts. Many of my nearest and dearest are, like me, at the midlife stage where we’re actively trying to declutter our homes and lives.

Not quite “Swedish death cleansing” (proactively getting rid of items that neither you nor your family will need/want after you pass away) but definitely at the juncture where amassing “stuff” no longer holds an appeal in the way that it once did.

If you find yourself in a similar quandary, fear not. I have compiled a list of suggestions to keep handy for the next time you find yourself falling into a present-buying abyss.

A cutting from the garden

This is genius. Because it’s not something that is going to take up space in their home. It is thoughtful and brings joy without being expensive or ostentatious.

And if, for whatever reason, they don’t get round to planting it, they can discreetly chuck it into the brown bin with no questions asked and just pretend the plant didn’t thrive in their soil or was nibbled into oblivion by a passing rabbit. Win-win.

Car boot sale and charity shop gems

Have you ever been wandering round a charity shop or car boot sale and spotted something nostalgia-inducing that made you break into an instant smile?

Yep, I appreciate that I was saying a mere moment ago that the last thing any of us needs is more “stuff”, yet sometimes you see an object that immediately sparks a happy memory.

Remember those kitsch soup bowls with recipes written on the side? A good friend owned five (oxtail, mushroom, chicken, onion and Scotch broth) - bequeathed by a late aunt - but her favourite (tomato) had been accidentally broken some years previously.

I was at a garden fete and spotted a replacement tomato soup bowl in a box of old crockery at a bric-a-brac stall. I snapped it up for £3. To say she was over the moon is an understatement.

Instant escapism

Two words: enamel mug. There is something oddly thrilling about sipping from one. In reality, I may be sitting on my back doorstep in suburbia, however, in my mind’s eye, I’m Bear Grylls or Ray Mears living on the edge in the great outdoors.

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And when the midges get too much? You simply step back inside the comfort of your own living room and continue to use the mug while watching something nice on Netflix.

A mix tape

Some say cheesy, I say classic. These days we’re not talking about a physical tape (or even a CD for that matter). Instead, you can easily make a playlist on Spotify, Apple Music - or another streaming platform - then share it with your person of choice.

Nothing says I care like a meticulously compiled extravaganza of 1980s power ballads or a curated compendium of the greatest synth bangers of all-time. 

Making plans and then cancelling

Disclaimer: this only works if you are friends with an extroverted introvert like me who will rarely be offended by nixed plans. In fact, chances are we will actually love you even more for it.

I know that sounds strange but hear me out. As anyone of a similar disposition will tell you, we spend much of our lives reluctantly doing things that we agreed to while in a sociable mood, only to be hit with deep regret when our default hermit mode once again kicks in.

The beauty of this gift? The recipient already has a whole afternoon or evening blocked off in their calendar where everyone knows they aren’t free. They can then use that for a little bit of guilt-free pampering or uninterrupted me-time. You’re welcome.