Things get off to an inauspicious start for Team Herald in Stuttgart, when it emerges that we can't check into our Airbnb on the outskirts of town until 6pm.
As a result we're forced to decamp to a local Starbucks to work, along with all our worldly possessions.
Eventually the host says we might be able to get in by 4.30 so we head to the apartment which is in the hills surrounding the city but, alas, there is no answer at the door or from the host.
As we stand in the baking sun on an anonymous Stuttgart street, Jonny blames Josh for convincing us to head up early and Josh maintains it's Jonny's fault for booking an Airbnb with a check-in time of 6pm. I'll let the readers be the jury.
Read More from our Euro 2024 diary:
-
Stuttgart braces for the Tartan Army as Scotland head south with a dream in tact
Thoroughly exhausted after a late night at the game the night before, we opt to stay in the apartment when we finally gain entry, which turns out to be incredible - like some sort of Bond villain lair under the mountains, complete with a massive television.
We watch England be thoroughly unimpressive in a draw against Denmark, and Spain play Italy off the park in the late game. How did we beat them in qualifying, we wonder?
The next day brings vox pop duties ahead of the big match, and one of my own bright ideas proves to be difficult, and at times problematic.
As some readers may be aware, the nation most joked about by Hungarians is... Scotland.
A very kind Magyar colleague tells me how to say "tell me your best Scottish joke", which I write on a sign in a bit of impromptu arts and crafts.
The idea is that I'll get Hungarians to tell me their favourite jokes about us, and I'll then put them to the Tartan Army - you can read more about this over the weekend.
Unfortunately this proves challenging, with many worried that they'll offend us. "I don't want to be racist", one tells me.
That's sadly not true of another, who says she cannot help because "I only know jokes about the Jews". We get out of that one sharpish.
To even things up, a street musician who has been playing Flower of Scotland on some kind of portable organ asks what language my sign is.
I explain that it's Hungarian, and that I'm looking to hear some jokes about Scotland.
"Well, Hungarians and Romanians are the worst people," the man tells me. I attempt to walk away. "This is not a joke, you are looking for jokes but this is true - they are the disgrace of Europe."
Neither of these people should be taken as representative of Hungarians or Germans, everyone else we encounter is pleasant and welcoming. Still, probably won't make the edit.
So, look, it's a privilege to be able to come to Germany and cover Scotland's major tournament adventure. But if you think it's glamourous, try walking up and down a street for several hours, carrying a sign written in a language you don't speak, trying to solicit jokes.
It's to be hoped Scotland will have the last laugh on Sunday.
Why are you making commenting on The Herald only available to subscribers?
It should have been a safe space for informed debate, somewhere for readers to discuss issues around the biggest stories of the day, but all too often the below the line comments on most websites have become bogged down by off-topic discussions and abuse.
heraldscotland.com is tackling this problem by allowing only subscribers to comment.
We are doing this to improve the experience for our loyal readers and we believe it will reduce the ability of trolls and troublemakers, who occasionally find their way onto our site, to abuse our journalists and readers. We also hope it will help the comments section fulfil its promise as a part of Scotland's conversation with itself.
We are lucky at The Herald. We are read by an informed, educated readership who can add their knowledge and insights to our stories.
That is invaluable.
We are making the subscriber-only change to support our valued readers, who tell us they don't want the site cluttered up with irrelevant comments, untruths and abuse.
In the past, the journalist’s job was to collect and distribute information to the audience. Technology means that readers can shape a discussion. We look forward to hearing from you on heraldscotland.com
Comments & Moderation
Readers’ comments: You are personally liable for the content of any comments you upload to this website, so please act responsibly. We do not pre-moderate or monitor readers’ comments appearing on our websites, but we do post-moderate in response to complaints we receive or otherwise when a potential problem comes to our attention. You can make a complaint by using the ‘report this post’ link . We may then apply our discretion under the user terms to amend or delete comments.
Post moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours.
Read the rules hereLast Updated:
Report this comment Cancel