Every December we’re urged to remember the true meaning of Christmas and not get bogged down in consumerism.

I’m an atheist, so my 'true meaning of Christmas' is spending time with loved ones and eating cheese, rather than the religious significance. But I have always agreed that the presents are a very small part of a special day. And this year, I think they should be even less important.

Look, I don’t want to be a grinch. But wouldn’t it be great if this was the year that we finally said: no more. No more buying £10 gifts that no one really wants but we all exchange at Christmas. No more spending more than we can afford just to give the kids a massive pile of gifts under the tree. And no more financial anxiety over a day that is meant to be about joy and family and relaxing with loved ones.

For a long time, the spending pressure has been ratcheting up. It used to be gifts and food, now it’s Christmas Eve boxes and matching family pyjamas, including a set for the dog. It’s Instagram-able lantern walks and new outfits for the magical elf that delights the children by moving around every night. And it all has a price tag.

None of those things are necessarily bad, of course, I am not judging anyone’s Christmas cheer. It’s been a tough few years and we all need some light. But this year we could say: no more! Let’s be free of the pressure to spend a fortune on a perfect day and use that spare energy to focus on actually enjoying time together.

Now is the perfect time to suggest to family and friends that you don’t go big on gifts this year, maybe even that you don’t buy presents at all. The chances are that at least some of them will be pleased and relieved that someone else has suggested it, so you’ll be helping their finances as well as your own.

These days the buying begins in November with the US import of Black Friday and it carries on until long after Christmas. Even the Boxing Day sales now start on Christmas Eve, as soon as it’s too late to get purchases delivered in time for the 25th. It’s always a spending frenzy that all too often leaves people with a debt hangover as they head into the new year.

This year is very different. So many people are struggling financially because their bills are rising thanks to inflation that’s running at 11.1%. Many people are striking this month, from rail to Scottish teachers to nurses, meaning they’re taking a hit to their salaries just before Christmas. Many other people have been affected by strike action and general disruption, affecting their ability to get to work or adding to their expenses. And a huge number of people are worried about what 2023 will bring as almost every analyst thinks we’re going to be in recession at least for all of next year.

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t try to make Christmas special for children and most people who celebrate will want to buy the kids some treats to go under the tree. But even there, this is the perfect year to suggest buying less. Their friends’ parents may be struggling and have less under the tree this year and there’s no shame in talking to children about the cost of living crisis and why we are all tightening our belts.

The company Wealthify surveyed 1,000 parents and found that one in four of the presents their children received last year weren’t wanted. One in three mums and dads said their kids were given too many presents, with 8% of what they got last year already being sent to landfill. It’s amazing to treat children at Christmas but it’s not necessary to overload them.

So that’s my plea. This is the year where we really can say: no more presents, no more junk, no more mindless spending. This is the year it can finally be all about loved ones. And cheese, obviously.

Alternatives to buying junk

Not everyone is going to welcome the idea of a Christmas with no presents, even in a cost of living crisis. But there are ways to keep the cost right down – here’s some inspiration:

• Make something
You don’t have to be an artist to make something your loved ones will enjoy. If you can knit or paint or write a poem then that’s a lovely present. But if your skills are less crafty then you could always bake a batch of cookies or make fairy cakes. It’s thoughtful, kind and everyone likes cookies.

• Swap something
A great way to save money is to agree with family not to buy anything new but to give something you already own, like a game your dad enjoys or the jumper of yours that your sister has always liked. This can be a profoundly thoughtful way to give and receive without anyone spending cash.

• Secret Santa
It’s an oldie but a goodie. You all buy a gift for just one person (there are online Secret Santa generators online if you want to make it truly random) so that everyone receives something but no one has to break the bank. For this to work well, it’s a good idea to set a price limit.

• Charity shop gifting
You can do some good and spend a lot less by agreeing that all gifts must come from charity shops this December. Yes, it will take a bit of extra time looking around your local charity retailers but remember that many charities also have online shops. And you will all know that your gifts have cost a bit less and helped a bit more.