HAPPY Halloween. It is usually about now that I begin kicking myself that I haven’t come up with a better/slicker/funnier costume idea.
But this year, there is no shortage of topical inspiration to stoke the imagination and get in the spirit. Here’s some themes to wow friends and loved ones.
Rishi Sunak aka Slider-Man
I am still haunted by the sight of Rishi Sunak’s socks-and-slider combo as captured in photographs charting the Chancellor of the Exchequer as he prepared for Budget Day last week.
Sunak teamed the £95 Palm Angels plastic slip-ons – a Milan-based streetwear label that is a staple of the downtown LA, skater-scene crowd and favoured by celebrities such as Rihanna and Justin Bieber – with thick socks.
If shelling out the best part of £100 seems steep, you could rein in the costs by donning a pair of three-for-a-pound classic sports socks. Accessorise with a Twix and a can of Sprite.
Vibe: Try-hard rich boy. Score: 8/10.
Squid Game player
Chances are you will be one of about 142 million people contemplating dressing up as a character from the hit Netflix dystopian thriller. The big selling point: comfort.
READ MORE: Susan Swarbrick: Hallowe'en obsessed? My house looks like it is auditioning for a Tim Burton movie
What could be simpler than throwing on a green tracksuit and sticking a number between 001 and 456 to your chest?
Vibe: Finger-on-the-pulse culture vulture. Score: 9.5/10.
An avocado
Are avocados ever out of the news? One day they will rise up to become our overlords. Until then, we will continue to worship them like the ancient Egyptians did with cats.
Top tip: bring added authenticity to your avocado get-up this Halloween by having a friend push you about in a Waitrose trolley.
Vibe: Posh mushy peas. Score: 7/10.
Trumpenstein’s monster
As if we didn’t face enough toxicity online, former US president Donald Trump has newly announced plans to launch his own social media network.
Slap on the fake tan (rubbing the contents of a family-sized bag of Wotsits all over your face and body should give the same desired effect), then use some rat-chewed straw as hair. Instant Trump doppelganger.
Vibe: Heinous day-glow narcissist. Score: 6/10.
Roy family media mogul
Succession is the best thing on telly at the moment. Think sharp tailored suits, crisp shirts, expensive peacoats and flashy watches – or for an off-duty look go for chunky knits, waxed jackets and logo-free baseball caps.
Be it Kendall, Roman, Shiv, Connor or big dog Logan Roy himself, the goal is to look absurdly wealthy. Be sure to practise your haughty sneer in front of the mirror.
Vibe: Billionaires behaving badly. Score: 10/10.
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