Title contender
MEDIA scholars will inform you that not all journalism involves drinking in the pub, thinking in the pub, and thinking about drinking in the pub.
Occasionally work gets done in newsrooms, too. (Once all other avenues have been explored, of course.)
Some heroic hacks spend lengthy parts of each day devising witty headlines to delight and dazzle their readership.
David Donaldson was particularly impressed by a recent example of this art form which appeared in a New York Times article about Moray eels, who apparently can hunt on land.
The headline was…
“When an Eel Climbs a Ramp to Eat Squid From a Clamp, That’s a Moray.”
Wedded woe
WE can all stop cowering behind the sofa. The trauma of watching our national footy team fumble, flail and flop is over for another year.
But they’ll be back. (Oh, they’ll be back.) Like Christopher Lee in umpteen Dracula movies, our lads will rise and roam the land again, feasting their fangs on fans’ tender jugulars in next to no time.
Reader Julie McAlpine describes the situation best: “Watching Scotland and believing we can win is like a second marriage, a triumph of hope against experience.”
Sci-Fi The Noo
THE Diary has published a few floaty, boaty tales of late, which doesn’t surprise Malcolm Boyd from Milngavie.
“These stories reflect the West of Scotland’s heritage of travelling to distant shores,” he points out, “and we will also have similar stories to read in the future, as another ship – the Starship Enterprise - had a Scots engineer.”
Very true. The legendary catchphrase certainly wasn’t: “Beam me up, Welshy.”
The name game
AN observant reader recently spotted an Orkney store with a colourful name. With this in mind, Margaret Thomson points out that on Kirkwall’s Main Street there is a dress shop called… Klaize.
Eccentric sipper
THE husband of reader Mary Jamieson was typing on his computer in a coffee shop when he spotted a suspicious chap.
“He was sat on his own with no mobile phone or laptop to be seen,” hubby later recalled, adding: “Do you think he was one of those weirdos who go to coffee shops to drink coffee?”
Monkeying around
THOUGHT for the day from reader Tam Miller: “Refusing to accept Darwin’s Theory of Evolution is proof that the theory is correct and you are trapped at Stage 1.”
Tolkien nonsense
“I’M thinking about installing a Lord of the Rings-themed kitchen,” says reader Theresa Scott. “Apparently it has a great hob bit.”
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