THIS week a new book on the Trump family revealed The Donald once dated a Norwegian cosmetics heiress called Celina Midlefart, and it’s sad the couple never married because the surname matches up with the man whose mouth somehow manages to produce so much intestinal gas. (As Ms Midlefart got up to use the restaurant loo, Trump locked in on Melania).

The book also reveals Trump’s first son was conceived not out of primal love for a new life but for tax avoidance purposes. And when Ivana suggested the name Donald Jnr, his dad countered; “But what if he’s a loser?”

The point of these little revelations is that they reinforce our opinion of a man capable of displaying utter contempt for creeds - his Moslem entry ban; nations - Mexico; persons of colour - the African-Americans barred from renting his apartments. We’re reminded of his tax avoidance, and the small businesses the man with the small hands refused to honour his debts to.

We know President Trump’s integrity to be as thin as the hair covering left after his failed scalp reduction operation.

But that doesn’t mean our political leaders (if the FM and her cohorts are granted an audience) should not treat Trump’s arrival with respect. London Mayor’s Sadiq Khan’s sanction this week of a giant nappy-wearing Trump balloon was capital balloonery, ersatz State-sponsorship. (Wonder what would happen if anti-London Mayor lobbyists floated the idea of a diapered Khan?) And it was also hypocritical, given the UK’s ability to set aside human rights concerns over Saudi Arabia and Turkey.

Donald Trump may well be the Mad Hatter of World Politics, who can switch effortlessly to becoming the Queen of Hearts, killing off careers and opposition voices with a single Tweet. His administration puts children in cages. And as a political leader he makes our own clown Boris seem competent by comparison.

But The Donald represents the White House, and he bridges our relationship, so vital in the Second World War and during the Cold War, with the most powerful nation on Earth. The Leader of the Free World is coming to town (albeit to play a round of golf) and we have to treat him as such.

We have to push aside the fact he is the modern-day representation of WB Yeats’ 1919 poem, Second Coming; “Things fall apart, the centre cannot hold, mere anarchy is loosed upon the world. What is this strange beast slouching towards Bethlehem.” (Holyrood?)

Indeed, our leaders have to understand and embrace the fact Trump singularly represents Yeats’ fear, when the poet anticipates the confusion, the terror of modern day politics, the growth of the far right across Europe, all confirmed by the fact that the venally ambitious Trump has been allowed to triumph in the first place.

For that reason we need to play the golfer. It would be all too easy for the FM and co to greet him waving Mexican flags or posting pics of little Guatemalan girls. That’s the job of student protesters and trades unionists and women’s rights groups, to take to the streets or the beaches of Troon or Aberdeenshire.. (Let’s hope predicted violence doesn’t ensue; Trump won’t be looking out of the windows of Air Force One worrying about the havoc he’s provoked.)

But the reality is public name-calling won’t matter to this man who didn’t wish to have his son named after him in case he grew up to be a numpty.

Yet, he can be worked at a personal level. Like all petulant bullies he can’t handle face-to-face confrontation. So we can learn from French President Macron how to put Trump’s verbal gas at a peep. We can even learn from the “Little Rocket Man” in how to lessen the likelihood of nuclear confrontation.

Our leaders, if they can get in a room with the man, need to be cleverer than Donald Trump, (which shouldn’t be hard.)They should feed him up on flattery and artery-hardening fudge, and then ask what he can do for our country?

It doesn’t matter that Nicola Sturgeon once refused to take calls from the man. Jaw-jaw is always better than war. So bring him onside, reach at least a vague understanding on trade economics and then try to get human rights onto the agenda.

And let’s bear in mind the upcoming Brexit chaos, (Trump’s declaration of a Britain being in turmoil is on the money), bear in mind too it could well open the door to Scottish independence - and the need to realign this country’s position on the world stage.

Trump’s arrival in Scotland in fact has its positives (if we can push aside the £5m policing cost). He single-handedly represents the denial of democracy, the return of the despot to the West. He threatens the freedom of the press.

So let’s play with Ms Midlefart’s ex, but remember this isn’t a Chamberlain-Hitler scenario we’re dealing with. For not to do so could be dangerous. And in taking this pragmatic stance, by not endorsing giant balloons floating over Holyrood, we get to hold on to the string of dignity.