THE International Space Station should be visible over Britain in the next couple of days. Reader Ian Barnett recalls: "I visited Majorca last year with some golfing pals. Knowing when it was due to pass, I got everyone out of the hotel bar to share the experience. All watched except a couple from Wales with their two children. When I asked the dad why they did not let the kids see it, he replied that they had already watched it the previous Christmas Eve. Dad had told them it was Santa, and he did not want them to know he fibbed."

WE hear about a hotel receptionist in Glasgow who was asked to give a guest a six-in-the-morning wake-up call. By mistake she phoned him at five am, and when he grumpily answered the phone, and she realised her mistake, she blurted out: "Just to let you know you have one hour more to sleep before your wake-up call."

OUR mention of workplace nicknames reminds Donald Thomson in Bearsden that workers coming from abroad has increased the possibilities. Says Donald: "We had a guy in the office once, with the surname Mehta. His nickname became, of course, Disney."

WE like the admission of 5 Live Breakfast presenter Rachel Burden, when asked in this week's Radio Times about on-air howlers, who stated: "When Dudley Moore died, I wondered on air if Peter Cook would have any words in tribute – he was already dead.”

A NEWLANDS reader is still confused by a conversation between two girls on his bus into the city centre yesterday. They were having an argument about St Valentine's Day, and one eventually spat out: "So what if I didn't get a card on Valentine's Day! You didn't get a Patrick on St Patrick's Day, did you?."

SCOTTISH Tory leader Ruth Davidson was watching the Bafta film awards on the telly the other night. As she later told followers on social media: "Tom Cruise's face. I don't know what he's doing to it, but he's beginning to look like a late-90s era Sandi Toksvig." Now that's cutting.

TALKING of politics, Scots actor Alan Cumming over in America, who has just had a sell-out show at New York's Carnegie Hall, was getting angrier and angrier when watching the latest debate amongst the Republican candidates. His comments on the night included:*Build the wall with your hair, Donald! I'd pay for it.

*This would be such fun if there wasn't a chance that one of these insane people might be president of the US.

*Poor Ben Carson and poor Jeb Bush. One is a bit dim and the other is being bullied because of his dim brother.

MEANWHILE in the Democrat camp, Bernie Sanders has surprised everyone with his strong showing. As one late night commentator on American telly put it: "Sanders had 27,500 in the sport arena in Los Angeles. In August, 11,000 in Phoenix, 28,000 in Portland on a Sunday. A guy in his 70s filling stadiums? Who does he think he is, a Rolling Stone?"

DID you know what day yesterday was? According to Simon Caine it was "Happy Half-Priced Heart-Shaped Chocolate Day!"