There was much excitement this week at news that a new “superhenge” has been found just down the road from Stonehenge in Wiltshire.
The 500m site at Durrington Walls apparently features up to 90 15ft standing stones (okay, they’ve actually fallen down), and forms part of a far more complex web of Neolithic henges, burial sites and shrines than was ever previously imagined.
“This is archaeology on steroids!” wooped Vince Gaffney, head of the project that made the discovery. I know he was probably just hyping up the lingo to get some media coverage, but Mr Gaffney and his colleagues should be careful what they wish for. After all, look what happened to Stonehenge.
On the day I visited five years ago, I got lost on the way and accidentally drove by the site on the busy A303. My companion and I waved from the car as the famous stones whizzed past in seconds. We should have kept on driving.
Instead, we doubled back, paid our £14 entry fee and queued up with hundreds of others to be herded through the World Heritage Site. As I stood behind the little rope and looked across at the stones I tried to be impressed, I really did. But since you’re not allowed to walk through or touch them, it’s hard to make much of a connection; the constant sound of lorries on the A303 tends to halt the flow of imaginative juices.
Nothing much came in the way of feelings all. Except of the murderous kind when one of the other visitors - a very posh white bloke with dreadlocks who smelled of patchouli oil - started telling his young daughter a load of hokum about Stonehenge's links to the Illuminati.
We exited through the gift shop. Overpriced key rings and fridge magnets were purchased. Underwhelmed is an understatement.
It couldn’t be more different up at Callanish, on Lewis. As you walk freely through and touch the extraordinary stones there, as the wonderful Hebridean light passes over them, as you survey the dark and mysterious landscape beyond, your imagination comes to life. And it’s free.
Being within a few hours’ drive of London has not served Stonehenge well. So, what now for the Wiltshire sites? Perhaps we’ll soon be able to visit Hengeland, a Disney-style theme park complete with Neolithic rollercoasters. Or maybe Center Parcs would do something a bit more, you know, middle class, with Stone Age bungalows and axe-making workshops for the kids.
Or perhaps they should be transported to Lewis and given the Callanish treatment? Actually, scrub that. I wouldn’t wish the posh dreadlock brigade on my worst enemy.
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