FEW, sadly, now remember Jimmy Logie, the Scottish-born Arsenal midfielder who starred for the Gooners between 1939 and 1955. He has, however, achieved immortality of sorts. According to a new book by Daniel Smith, on Cockney rhyming slang, Logie lives on, as his surname conveniently ryhmes with ‘bogie’.

IN A similar vein, the book also notes that Sir Walter Scott’s name rhymes with ‘pot’ and Harry Lauder’s with ‘warder’. Even Scapa Flow gets a mention - ‘go’, as in flee. Any good examples of Glasgow rhyming slang out there?

IT had to happen, sooner or later. Gordon Casely, out on Iona, came across a local pocket guidebook. He thought at first that it was part of the ubiquitous Lonely Planet series. But he checked again and saw that it was really called The Lonely Gannet's Pocket Guide to Iona ...

ANOTHER tale (or 'tail', if you must) from Oliver Jackson, a partner at Pets 'n' Vets.

The vets have been microchipping a huge number of dogs recently as this form of identification is set to become mandatory in Scotland next year.

The information contained on the chips consist of a long numerical code. The vets check all chips before implanting them to ensure they are reading correctly.

Says Oliver: "I was a little concerned to find that we had reached chip number 9***********666 - I was certain that clients would be upset to have their pet given this devilish number.

"But my concerns were entirely misplaced as I called in the next client - a Goth in full make-up, piercings and black attire. Turns out that she was absolutely delighted that her pet, Fluffy, received microchip number 666."

REBUKES/insults, etcetera. Billy Mitchell alerts us to an utterance by the foreman on a building site: “ Get this man up to First Aid – have him X-rayed to see if there's any work in him."

BIBLICAL tale from Robin Gilmour.

A wee boy was thumbing through the family bible that his dad had just unearthed from its usual place.

Suddenly something fell out of the Bible onto the floor - an old leaf that had been pressed between the pages.

"Mum!" the boy exclaims to his mother. "Look what I've found!"

"So what have you found, dear?" she asks.

The boy pauses. "I think it's Adam's underwear."

OLD Horse-Racing Jokes Dept. Clyde 1 presenter Knoxy tweeted at the weekend a plea for any tips for the racing at Ayr. "I've never won!" she added.

Responded one David Meikle: "I'd go for the horse called Dusty Carpet. It's never been beaten."

A CERTAIN reader, responding to recent items about street names bearing people’s names, may have topped them all.

John Mulholland says with a glimmer of pride that there’s a Mulholland Drive in Los Angeles County; that Mulholland Drive is the title of a David Lynch film; that there has also been a film called Mulholland Falls; and that Tom Petty, no less, sang about “gliding down over Mulholland.”

Beat that, says John.

NO wonder there seems to be no alcohol abuse in Norwich. Thanks to Donald Britton for sending this one in.