SAY what you like about the way Members of Parliament used to claim expenses.

Such as, it was corrupt and sometimes criminal. At least it encouraged MPs to be innovative and aspirational, if not honourable.

Tory MP Sir Peter Viggers claiming £1645 to build accommodation for his ducks. Douglas Hogg (aka Viscount Hailsham) putting in a £2115 bill for having the moat at his country estate cleaned. Not to mention legions of politicians making vast profits in the property market by flipping second homes.

The news that Liam Fox, pictured, East Kilbride boy turned English Conservative MP, charged 3p mileage for a car journey reveals new depths of pettiness, meanness, and lack of imagination. The 3p represents 0.06 miles (or 118 yards) at 45p per mile. His philosophy is look after the yards and the miles will look after themselves.

An idle browse through Westminster records reveals a £1.45 car trip round Castlemilk by Glasgow South MP Tom Harris. That's three miles, epic by Dr Fox's standards.

I also chanced upon a claim by Mr Harris for a spot of supper at the House of Commons. The sum of £4.55 is unremarkable but his explanation is interesting. Under the heading "details" he wrote: "I bought food and then I ate it."

This is, of course, an example of Mr Harris's legendary sparkling wit. But it is sadly inaccurate. The taxpayer bought the food and then Harris ate it. I thought we had stopped feeding MPs. But on the same night, my own MP Ann McKechin received £5.05 of public scran and John Robertson, MP for just up the road, charged £15 for dinner "as per agreement". If MPs are kept after 7.30pm they get a free dinner.

Dunfermline Labour MP Thomas Docherty has argued that Westminster members should qualify for a taxpayer-funded meal every night they are in London, working late or not.

Mr Docherty should have opted for Holyrood instead. He could be home for his dinner. Or he could follow the example of the last MSP for Dunfermline who regularly stayed in an Edinburgh hotel enjoying accommo­dation, dinner and "refreshments" on the Holyrood expenses sheet. Despite living relatively close to he capital. Apparently we are still feather-bedding, feeding and refreshing our MSPs.

This former MSP is Bill Walker, now being put up at taxpayers' expense (in prison at a cost of about £32,000 a year). But probably not getting refreshments with his evening meal.