It was a very unusual FMQs. Not only was there some bitter Nat-on-Nat action by way of a warm-up, but Humza Yousaf actually enjoyed himself.

He hasn’t been this happy since he dreamt he lost the SNP leadership.

The prelude was Alba unicorn Ash Regan goring laid-back Indy minister Jamie Hepburn.

A decade on from the last Indyref, why isn’t there another, she demanded to know.

Mr Hepburn yawned half-heartedly about wanting one, but also having no plans to do it.

“When any proposal for such a referendum emerges, we will give it proper consideration,” he drawled, as if Santa were planning to oblige.  

In the meantime, the Government was banging out those independence prospectus papers.

“With respect, Minister, papers can be produced by anyone,” sniffed Ms Regan. 

“What the independence movement wants at this point is action.”

Opening one eye, Mr Hepburn insisted he was pursuing independence, albeit by waiting drowsily for something to happen. He’d also had four thinly-attended debates on it.

“I know that [Ms Regan] has not been able to take part in any of those,” he miaowed. 

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FMQs proper kicked off with Douglas Ross tearing into Mr Yousaf over what used to be Scotland’s health service, and is now a tottering pretendy version of it.

The Auditor General, no less, had diagnosed a host of maladies and “no overall vision”.

The BMA had called the assessment “staggeringly bleak”.

Mr Yousaf admitted there was “still a way to go” on the NHS, although whether he meant up or down was unclear. He then kept repeating that he’d put £19.5billion into it last year. 

That this had bought lots of crummy failures seemed by the by.

“We will respond to the report in due course,” said the FM.

“Do it now! Do it now!” shouted the Scottish Tory leader.

As he huffed and puffed, his swivel chair rotated 180 degrees. Health Secretary Neil Gray turned it round to catch him. No point. The FM had already fallen on his metaphorical a**e.

But then…. a miracle. A resurrection. A complete revival.

Anas Sarwar went on Labour’s plan for a bigger windfall tax on energy companies.

Mr Yousaf blinked in disbelief. This was practically his specialist subject.

He’d railed against the tax in a speech in Aberdeen on Monday. North Sea folk hated it. Said it could cost 100,000 jobs. Sir Keir Starmer is to oil-rigs what Thatcher was to coal-mines. Whoo-hoo!

The FM never looked back. He absolutely flattened his opponent. “I cannot wait to go head to head with Anas Sarwar in Aberdeen during the general election,” he cackled joyfully.  

Aberdeen Nat Kevin Stewart took the edge off by asking if Mr Yousaf’s engagement with the oil and gas sector would continue - almost as if it had been a cynical stunt! - but by then it didn’t really matter. Mr Sarwar was scowling as hard as Mr Yousaf was grinning. 

The SNP benches were ecstatic. The boss had done good. If only he could do it twice...