FACE it, this week’s Icon is tongue in cheek. I’m going out on a limb to pull your leg, making no bones about ribbing you.

Let’s laugh at ourselves. Everyone else does. We’re the last people in the world at whom it’s acceptable to make derogatory national comments. We’re a joke. Though we’ll headbutt anyone else who says so.

Shrek is the eponymous character – an ogre – in a series of American computer-animated fantasy films (and a musical), based originally on a 28-page illustrated children’s book by William Steig. In the films, he’s played with a Scottish accent, and that choice tells us something about ourselves, how others see us i.e. we live in swamps, and are oafish, thrawn, gruff and gross.

Shrek 2 became the highest-grossing animated film of all time in the United States, making around $3.5 billion worldwide. The first film came out in 2001. Shrek 5, having been held up by Covid, is even now deep into production.

Thus, many millions have watched the antics of the Scottish-speaking ogre, who has also become an internet meme, even finding his way with weary predictability into porn.

But … is Shrek actually Scottish? We shall return to this vexed question. First, something about the story. Shrek is a large, green-skinned fellow. Not a good start, as the Scottish complexion is generally grey (in winter) or red (in summer). However, like many Scottish people, Shrek wears a tiny, brown, home-made waistcoat that comes down to his nipples.

Taunted and persecuted by humans, the ogre seeks solitude far from them and, consequently, becomes cranky and misanthropic. Alas, this admirable state is challenged when – wait for it – he falls in love (yawn) with Princess Fiona (good Scottish name) and seeks, in the unwanted company of an excitable donkey, to rescue her from the clutches of scheming Lord Farquaad.

As it turns out, Fiona is also an ogre, or ogress if we can still say that, and so in the end (spoiler alert: come on, it’s a fairy tale ending), the ugly couple … well, sit doon and watch it for yourself, if you’re one of the three people in the world who haven’t already done so.

So … so … so why was Shrek given a Scottish accent? Well, it was to denote class more than nation. The accent donor was Canadian actor Mike Myers who, interestingly enough (the plot thickens!), had already played a Scottish character in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me. That was Fat Bastard, an obese, foul-mouthed, farting baddie from Clydebank.

Shrek also farts. Beginning to see a pattern here. Perhaps, rather than argue over Flower of Scotland or Scotland the Brave, we should just make our national anthem one big long raspberry. At any rate, while Shrek sounds Scottish, the movies reveal no more about his inferred nationality.

Originally, his accent was going to be New Yoik, but the actor voicing that died unexpectedly, so Myers was asked to step in. At first, he tried it in his native Canadian, but felt “it just didn’t have any oomph”.

He wanted Shrek to sound “working class”, which is how we are seen as a nation, outwith Morningside, Kelvinside and so forth. Said Myers: “Scottish people are near and dear to me. I have relatives in Scotland and they’re working people. It’s a working people accent.”

The Scottish accent, he says, “comes naturally” to him. Although both parents hailed from Liverpool, his mother would do voices when reading him fairy tales at bedtime. And he believes that “Scotland in temperament in its way is a lot like Liverpool”.

He sees a class war in fairy tales, between kings and queens and their subjects. Ogres are down there with the plebs, and so playing one would require an accent that “sounds working class”.

Making the accent working class Scottish was also a ploy to put Shrek in helpful dramatic juxtaposition to posh English-sounding villain Lord Farquaad. Says Myers: “Since Lord Farquaad was played English, I thought of Scottish.” (Question somebody asked on Google: “Is Shrek Scottish or British?”) At the back of Myers’ mind, too, was the European origin of fairy tales.

Myers persuaded Dreamworks to re-record the ogre’s voice at considerable production expense and, after initial studio reluctance, executive producer Steven Spielberg allowed him to try it – “once”. Spielbeg liked it, saying, according to Myers: “You’re so right. It’s way better as Scottish.”

But is it a good Scottish voice? Scotch people get agitated about other folk doing their accents, excoriating even pretty decent attempts. Myers’ accent almost passes muster but, ironically, as – to my mind – a Morningside-Kelvinside middle-class accent. That is to say, anglicised.

True, many Scots speak like that, and Shrek does come out with Scottish sounding expressions, such as (to Donkey): “You’re going the right way for a smacked bottom.” But bottom? Would that be the word in Scotland? And the line as delivered is a bit Ewan McGregor (Perthshire posh).

According to the Scottish Voiceovers blog, despite the accent, Shrek lacks any national identity. “Shrek isn’t from Scotland, doesn’t live here, and Scotland probably doesn’t even exist in this fantasy world”. Despite representing some Scottish qualities with debatable accuracy, the films don’t “sell Scotland”.

That was left to our national pimp, Visit Scotland, which in 2007 created a special tartan kilt for the fictional character, presenting this to Myers in an attempt to cement the ogre’s Scottish heritage so that tourists might come looking for his swamp.

The Voiceover peeps say that, at best, Shrek is Scottish-ish. “Shrek is a Scottish-like portrayal of a non-Scottish character in a world where Scotland doesn’t exist. Shrek’s accent is simply a not-so-subtle way to suggest who the character is, connecting him to the stereotypes that the globe relates to our country whilst forcing the audience to compare him to the English-like villain directly.”

Still, if it sounds Scottish and it acts Scottish … And if it sounds English and it acts English … Only joking. Shrek is great fun anyway and, what the hell, he is actually the hero of the tale. Our hero.