IT was a day to resign, be resigned or, in some people’s cases, try desperately not to resign.
As the Johnsonite revolution slowly unfolded a question-mark hung over David Mundell’s fate. Would he jump, be pushed or cling onto the Dover House flag-pole for dear life?
His detractors could not resist reminding him of his conflict of interest given he had said a no-deal Brexit would be the biggest threat to the Union and would wreak economic catastrophe on the nation.
The SNP’s Perth champion, Pete Wishart, was the first to have a pop, questioning whether the Scottish Secretary would “develop anything approaching a backbone”.
Reminding him that he had suggested he could not serve in a Johnson Cabinet, Labour’s Lesley Laird asked him if he would “allow his principles to be stretched in defence of the Union, just so he can keep his job?”
But it was perhaps Change UK’s leader Anna Soubry, who might have made the most telling intervention when she pressed the Secretary of State on whether he would stay or go but noted how she hoped he would hang around.
To laughter Mr Mundell replied: “I fear the honourable lady’s endorsement will have sealed my fate.”
READ MORE: Boris Johnson delivers bloodiest cull as 17 exit government
As a neatly-coiffured Theresa May entered the chamber there was a loud cheer and stamping of feet. Up in the gallery Philip, her husband, sat upright; a symbol of support.
Jeremy Corbyn praised her sense of duty but that was the extent of his tribute as he then picked over her record as per-pupil school funding was down, police numbers were down and GP numbers were falling.
The Labour leader welcomed a number of policies like the reduction in the stake on fixed odds betting terminals but then ironically pointed out they had in fact been Labour policies.
The PM, who had been sucked into the polite atmosphere suddenly realised the ruse, and jabbing her finger at the chief comrade accused him at every stage “playing party politics” on Brexit. “Frankly,” she blasted, “he should be ashamed of himself.”
But the Maybot, who for once seemed on the verge of animation, left her severest riposte for last. After calming the heated atmosphere with a few quiet remarks and noting how she and Mr C were “very different people,” she pulled out the stiletto and plunged it into her opponent, saying: “As a party leader who has accepted when her time is up, might I suggest that perhaps the time is now for him to do the same?”
READ MORE: SNP say Ruth Davidson ‘humiliated’ after David Mundell sacked against her advice
The Tory berserkers let rip with hoots and cries of “more!”
After Labour’s Harriet Harman, the Mother of the House, gave the PM a bit of sisterly advice – “be a bit more careful when a man wants to hold your hand” – the House rose to applaud the outgoing premier; all MPs that is except for Labour and the SNP, who remained steadfastly seated.
The Maybot looked emotional as she grabbed her folder and dashed out of the chamber.
Later, after a spot of lunch with Philip in the Downing St garden and a farewell chat with staff the outgoing PM went out for the last time to urge Boris Johnson to secure a Brexit deal and move the nation on from the "current impasse".
She was interrupted by a cry of "stop Brexit" from a heckler outside Downing Street and quipped: "I think the answer to that is, I think not."
With that she was off in her chauffeur-driven limo to the Palace and, minutes later heralded by the whirr of a helicopter overhead the PM was back, transmogrified Dr Who-style, reappearing as Boris Johnson. Among the staff who dutifully filed out onto the Downing St pavement to hear the nation;s new leader was Carrie Symonds, the PM’s partner.
To a continuing chant of “stop Brexit” from a crowd outside the Downing St gates, Bozza gesticulated his enthusiasm about Britain and its can-do ability.
The critics had been wrong that Brexit could be done, blasted the PM, snapping: “The doubters, the doomsters, the gloomsters are going to get it wrong again." Britain, he insisted, would leave the EU on October 31 “no ifs or buts”.
After that the shiny, new premier was off to the Commons to begin building his shiny, new Cabinet. But first things first, were the sackings. After four ministers fell on their swords, Mr J wielded the knife ruthlessly, cutting loose 10 more, including Fluffy and Hunt.
Later, members of the new team were spotted entering No 10: Javid, Raab and Patel.
If anyone was in any doubt, this is a brand new Government. The biggest Cabinet clear-out in history. The era of Boris has begun. But the question is: how long will it last?
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