ALISON ROWAT The National Television Awards 2019 (ITV) *** OUT there in the celestial static, John Logie Baird must have looked down with pride yesterday as Roma became the latest made for television drama to be nominated for a best picture Oscar.
Meanwhile, over at The National Television Awards in London, Piers Morgan was slugging it out with This Morning to see who would spend the night getting hammered and going on air today still drunk.
Swings and roundabouts, Mr Baird, swings and roundabouts.
Scotland figured prominently in the awards, as was only fitting given the medium’s debt to Caledonian engineering genius. First came footage of Paisley’s Richard Madden, in Bodyguard mode, supposedly driving host Dermot O’Leary to the gig.
O’Leary didn’t quite make it on time, but waiting in the wings was Glasgow-born John Barrowman, who opened proceedings with That’s Entertainment (Judy, not the Jam). Barrowman gave it his all, teeth, tap dancers, teeth, ostrich feather fans, teeth. If camp could power Brexit, Theresa May would be home and dry by the weekend.
The usual lairy crowd of celebs and punters were in full voice. Madden, in the audience and in a dinner jacket - how lovely to see you, Mr Bond in waiting - received a massive cheer when Bodyguard won best new drama. Madden followed this with a trophy for best drama performance.
As the organisers never lost an opportunity to remind us, the NTAs are the only awards decided solely by the voting public, which has the dual advantage of being both democratic and lucrative. Just think: all those punters tuning in to see if their favourite has won. I wouldn’t say there was a lot of ad breaks but if you were having a drink for every one there would have been no chance of reaching nine o’clock conscious. O’Leary trod a fine line between being edgy and being punched, as when he teased Jack Whitehall for getting where he is today through nepotism (dad’s an agent, don’t you know). Less successful were the “comedy segments” featuring Danny Dyer’s daughter, Dani, and her Love Island ex, Jack Fincham, interviewing stars. If you had never watched Love Island before you were never going to start now.
Danny Dyer won an NTA award for his performance in EastEnders, but it could equally have been for his piercing insights into Brexit. After paying tribute to his mentor, Harold Pinter - yes, it is true - he then ruined the beautifully surreal moment by swearing. “I’m getting all emotional. Dunno what’s the ******* matter with me.” O’Leary apologised on his behalf.
In one of the night’s big moments, This Morning triumphed over Good Morning Britain for best daytime show, which should keep the London pub trade going for the next six months. Poor Piers.
The production team deserved an award for stretching what should have been an hour-long ceremony into two and a half hours, but finally we were on the home stretch. When I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here won the Bruce Forsyth Entertainment Award, Holly Willoughby, who stood in for the disgraced Ant McPartlin, made the acceptance speech. An absent McPartlin and his other celebrity half were not there, and not expected to feature either.
But the NTAs had one last surprise to pull, with the award for best presenters going to … Ant & Dec, one half of whom, Ant, had had most of the year off after an arrest for drink-driving. How did that happen? How could an absent McPartlin beat a present Willoughby to the prize? Stranger things have happened on TV, but not many.
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