NEVER was so much said about so little.

As has been amply well rehearsed by now, the enamel began to crack around Phil and Holly's smiles some weeks ago, dismaying TV execs and delighting the small but energetic band of body language experts who are wheeled out by the tabloids on such occasions to minutely examine every twitch and twist of a celebrity's movements.

Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby have been a TV husband and wife team on ITV's This Morning for the past 14 years, seemingly enjoying a genuine and supportive friendship both on-screen and off.

A froideur seems to have developed some time around Coffingate when Phil 'n Holly were slated for jumping the queue to see the late Queen lying in state in Westminster Abbey. 

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Whispers and speculation have been rife: had the pair fallen out? Is Schofield a bully? Was the friendship fake all along? There's murkiness around Schofield's brother's recent conviction for child sexual offences. Who is the wronged party and who the wrong 'un? 

The madness reached fever pitch with a mention of the couple in the House of Commons.

“We all know what’s going on with her and her leader,” Oliver Dowden, the deputy prime minister, smirked at Angela Rayner. “It’s all lovey-dovey on the surface, they turn it on for the cameras, but as soon as they’re off, it’s a different story. They’re at each other’s throats. They are the Phil and Holly of British politics.”

Finally, Schofield blinked first and issued a statement on Sunday saying he's leaving the show. A bloodless statement from Willoughby was issued in response. 

In the first This Morning since Phil was sacked-sorry-resigned, he was given a minute-long farewell mention that came across a little like he'd died.

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Remember the innocent days of Phil and Holly being criticised for the Spin to Win competition to pay a family's fuel bill? Innocent times. Now something is pungent but no one knows what it is.

Or, rather, those who know a lot can legally say very little. And thus we have pages upon pages of tabloid coverage of the rift without any new information or substance. 

It's also all the broadcast news programmes want to talk about, despite having guests on who profess not to know the first thing about Phil, Holly or daytime TV.

That's been quite enjoyable, actually, listening to political reporters desperately scrambling to fill some airtime about the pros and cons of who sits on the This Morning couch. 

What's been less enjoyable has been the terrible snobbery of it all. Before expressing any kind of opinion, the bulk of the talking heads have made sure to lead with the fact they barely know who Phil and Holly are and they certainly don't watch This Morning.

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I'm sorry, but if you're of my generation and you're trying to tell me that the broom cupboard and Gordon the gopher are a mystery to you then you are a liar. 

The national fever generated by this madness suggests there's something tragic about the whole scenario. A much-loved national treasure letting the country down. Has no one watched The Morning Show? If TV dramas are anything to go by, daytime telly is a cruel and unusual place rife with backstabbing and rivetingly complex relationships. 

This is all just part of the usual cycle.

And maybe it's time to re-examine that cycle. Why is daytime television so reliant on the tired trope of the TV couple, always an older, experienced man and a younger, more attractive woman. 

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TV marriages share in common with real marriages the fact that one signs a contract compelling one to be in proximity to another person. The British divorce rate is high; the British TV marriage divorce rate is higher still. 

Couples fall in and out of love, as do audiences. Perhaps more will be revealed about the behind-the-scenes machinations of This Morning, perhaps the public will be left panting for more. 

Does it matter? That depends on what's revealed in the next episode. A country waits for the latest installment.