Andrea McLean: 10 things I have learned about the menopause

In the space of two days, she had received 10,000 messages from viewers asking to be kept updated, seeking advice and requesting that McLean share her journey with them.

This public outpouring inspired her to write a new book, Confessions of a Menopausal Woman, in which she lays bare a gamut of symptoms including night sweats, anxiety, non-existent libido, bladder incontinence and mood swings, to name but a few.

It was McLean's aim to impart some words of wisdom that she herself would have liked to read while grappling with the physical and psychological fallout of her hysterectomy and menopause.

"I am happy that I did speak out," she says. "I get women hugging me in street and saying: 'Thank you for making me feel normal, I thought I was the only one.' I'm really happy that I have become the unintentional poster girl."

Here Mclean gives us 10 lessons she has learned about the menopause:

1. Keep a diary of your symptoms

"It will stop you worrying because if you write down how you feel, there is a release there and it makes you feel better," she says. "Even if it is in the notes section of your phone, keep track of how you feel mentally and physically.

"If you have had a brain fog kind of day where you can't remember anything or are feeling irritable, note that down. Whether it is physical feelings, such as sweats or fatigue.

"The reason that is so important is that when you go to the doctors, you've got a log to back you up rather than a wishy-washy 'I don't feel like myself…'"

2. Talk

"Speak to your friends and ask them how they are feeling. Is anyone else experiencing X, Y and Z?" suggests McLean. "There is an old saying that comparison is the thief of joy, but that's only if you are comparing yourself to other people and think they are amazing and you aren't quite as good.

"Comparison in this instance, however, is one of the most powerful things you have because when you can compare your symptoms to someone else and realise you are not alone, it makes you feel so much better."

3. Go to the doctors

"There is no point sitting at home thinking it will pass. Most women start the sentence with 'I'm sure it is nothing but …' while men just wouldn't do that," she says.

"I was speaking to a woman who had three years of feeling thoroughly dreadful. She went to the doctors and was finally able to do something about it. But that had been three wasted years where she could have felt so much better."

4. Look at what you are eating

"This doesn't mean going on a diet, but rather asking yourself: 'Is what I'm putting in my mouth helpful or just what I'm used to eating?" says McLean.

"I am a complete sugar addict. I managed to cut it completely out of my diet when I first started looking at what I was eating, but I am the same as everyone else: it has crept back in there. It is about balance because it is difficult on a day-to-day basis to be pure and good all the time.

"Look into foods that are good for your symptoms. For example, we are constantly reading about green vegetables and oily fish. It sometimes sounds like the world's problems could be solved with green vegetables and oily fish.

"But it is true. There is so much goodness in food, we forget you can use it as a medicine rather than just something that stops us being hungry.

"If you make a casserole, adapt it so that you are not suddenly using all new recipes. Lentils and pulses, if you make soup, stick some of those in there. Bung stuff into what you are already cooking, and you can start to make changes that way."

5. Change your attitude

"People seem to think they need to wait until they are 'menopausal', but all that means is that you haven't had a period for over a year," she explains.

"Actually, the perimenopause [also known as menopause transition] is the really difficult time because that is when your hormones are up and down and all over the place. That can last for 10 years or so.

"Put aside any preconceptions that you have to wait until a certain time. If you are not feeling right, no one knows you better than you."

6. Menopause is different for everyone, so keep an open mind

"People are talking about menopause more and that is wonderful, but there is no one fix for everyone," she says. "While it is useful to talk and share, get different stories and advice from friends, the only thing that works for you, is what works for you.

"Keep an open mind about how you are going to try and make yourself feel better."

7. There are different things to try

"A lot of women feel uncomfortable about the thought of using HRT [hormone replacement therapy] because of the negative press it has received in the past," says McLean. "Even though the worries that were spread about HRT have since been disproven.

"Inform yourself. Look into different solutions. There are natural forms of hormones. You can have plant-based or synthetic. Look into homeopathic [remedies], vitamins and minerals, diet and exercise – try a mixture of everything.

"My advice would be to keep tinkering until you find what works. You don't pop one pill and suddenly you're better. But you keep tinkering until you find something that works for you. My top tip is do not feel under any pressure to do what it seems like everyone else is doing.

"It is your body, so you do whatever you feel works for you. Don't think: 'Oh, people are going to disagree with me or think I'm an idiot for going down the homeopathic route or the HRT route.' Take advice, but the end decision is down to you because it is your body."

8. Keep a sense of humour

"As women we go through some incredibly tough times and 99 per cent of the time what gets us through is having a sense of humour," she says.

"If you can't laugh at the fact that the sweat is running off you, you can't remember what you have gone upstairs for and are running to standstill in terms of your fitness – nothing seems to be working the way it did before – then it is going to feel an awful lot harder.

"Whether it is just having a sense of humour and cutting yourself some slack, or being able to sit with a group of friends and have a good laugh about it, you will instantly feel better."

9. If you are in relationship, talk to your partner

"Your other half is not a mind reader and they will not necessarily automatically understand why you are behaving slightly differently," says McLean. "As human beings we are instinctively selfish and always think it is about us. And they will think it is about them.

"If you keep the lines of communication open and say: 'Do you know what? I'm really having an off day today. I feel like I'm going to be a bit snappy, so I apologise now because I think it is going to be a bumpy one.' That means the hackles aren't up. I personally find that really useful."

10. You will have sex again

"You might not think it, but you will," she says. "Sex is something that seems to fall off the radar when you are going through the menopause. You don't like it. You don't want to think about it. You get angry if anybody even mentions it.

"Be open and explain how you are feeling, then take steps to start to make yourself feel better. Most of our sex life goes on in our heads – nowhere else. Once you start to feel better in yourself, you will start to be a little bit more receptive to the idea, then you might give it a go.

"Then it is like anything. When you don't do something for ages, you don't really think about it. But, you know, it is like the first chocolate. You give it up for ages, then have one and think: 'Oh my God, I forgot how good this was.' Then you are off."

Confessions of a Menopausal Woman by Andrea McLean is published by Bantam Press, priced £14.99

FIVE WOMEN GET REAL ABOUT THE MENOPAUSE

Kim Cattrall, actress

"Literally one moment you're fine, and then another, you feel like you're in a vat of boiling water, and you feel like the rug has been pulled out from underneath you — especially the first experience.

"What I would say, which I've said to myself and to girlfriends who've also experienced hot flashes, is that change is part of being human. We evolve and should not fear that change.

"You're not alone. I feel that part of living this long is experiencing this, so I'm trying to turn it into a very positive thing for myself, which it has been, in the sense of acceptance and tolerance and education about this time of life."

Tracey Emin, artist

"People don't talk about it, but the menopause, for me, makes you feel slightly dead, so you have to start using the other things – using your mind more, read more, you have to be more enlightened, you have to take on new things, think of new ideas, discover new things, start looking at the stars, understand astronomy … just wake yourself up, otherwise it's a gentle decline.

"For women, it is the beginning of dying. It is a sign. I've got to start using my brain more – I've got to be more ethereal and more enlightened."

Oprah Winfrey, media mogul

"I've discovered that this is your moment to reinvent yourself after years of focusing on the needs of everyone else."

Julie Walters, actress

"It was like a chimney and came from the base of my spine. Every take there'd be, 'Stop! She's having a flush!' At the National, I'd come off stage for a quick change and have to shout, 'Garth, the tray!' And this guy would come with this big tin tray and fan me."

Zoe Ball, TV presenter

"I am hot and hairy. It's like my last hurrah. Is it going to get better? Do I do HRT or do I have the funny tea supplement?"