Lack of snack
GLASGOW TV and radio personality Paul Coia has a painful confession to make.
“I’m being hypocritical this morning,” he says, “when protesting about my childhood fave sweet, Caramac, being discontinued due to falling sales. A colleague just asked me when I last bought one. Erm…”
(And the moral of this tragic tale? Take a daily dose of your Caramac snack, or your Caramac snack, it won’t be back.)
Madcap monikers, continued
THE Diary is celebrating wacky workplace nicknames.
Says Ken Mackay from Netherlee: “I once worked at a joinery company where one of the employees was known as Minty, because he always came in After Eight.”
Crabby about Crimbo
ON social media, former Glasgow South Labour MP Tom Harris makes an astute festive observation: “It feels like complaints about Christmas starting earlier every year start earlier every year.”
Rhyme time, continued
THE Diary is trying to figure out what certain objects would be called if they had been named by the same bright spark who decided to call a two-way radio a walkie-talkie.
Reader Graham Andrews says: “I’m guessing a defibrillator would be called a hearty-starty.”
Gretna a-go-go?
A tale of the torrid and tempestuous sort, from the supposedly sanctified gates of the kirk, no less.
Eric MacDonald says: “As a member of a church in the seventies, long before email communications, a monthly newsletter was delivered to our members.
“I well remember one such publication, where the last line on the first page read: ‘Thanks to Jane White and Mark Brown for running off’.”
Browsers of the scandalous newsletter must have been swooning, collapsing onto a nearby chaise longue, then reaching for the sal volatile.
If only those same browsers had flipped over to the next page of the document, where they would have read the conclusion of the sentence, which was ‘…the newsletter on the Gestetner.’
(Younger Diary readers should be made aware that a Gestetner was a duplicating machine, not a nippy roadster to hasten an eloping couple to Gretna Green.)
Marie’s munchables
FINANCIALLY speaking, these are proving to be difficult times.
Which is why the Diary has decided to save business organisations oodles of dosh, by suggesting that instead of paying a fortune for celeb endorsements, they instead use famous figures from history to promote their goodies.
David Donaldson says: “Mr Kipling could have Marie Antoinette, saying ‘Let them eat cake’."
Get the legendary Herald Diary straight to your inbox.
Farmyard funny
FOOD for thought. Reader David Austin gets in touch to ask: “Is a cow without legs ground beef?”
Why are you making commenting on The Herald only available to subscribers?
It should have been a safe space for informed debate, somewhere for readers to discuss issues around the biggest stories of the day, but all too often the below the line comments on most websites have become bogged down by off-topic discussions and abuse.
heraldscotland.com is tackling this problem by allowing only subscribers to comment.
We are doing this to improve the experience for our loyal readers and we believe it will reduce the ability of trolls and troublemakers, who occasionally find their way onto our site, to abuse our journalists and readers. We also hope it will help the comments section fulfil its promise as a part of Scotland's conversation with itself.
We are lucky at The Herald. We are read by an informed, educated readership who can add their knowledge and insights to our stories.
That is invaluable.
We are making the subscriber-only change to support our valued readers, who tell us they don't want the site cluttered up with irrelevant comments, untruths and abuse.
In the past, the journalist’s job was to collect and distribute information to the audience. Technology means that readers can shape a discussion. We look forward to hearing from you on heraldscotland.com
Comments & Moderation
Readers’ comments: You are personally liable for the content of any comments you upload to this website, so please act responsibly. We do not pre-moderate or monitor readers’ comments appearing on our websites, but we do post-moderate in response to complaints we receive or otherwise when a potential problem comes to our attention. You can make a complaint by using the ‘report this post’ link . We may then apply our discretion under the user terms to amend or delete comments.
Post moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours.
Read the rules here