AS the dust settles on the hugely successful 2023 UCI Cycling World Championships and the cavalcade of top-class riders departs Scotland, spare a thought for those left trailing in their wake.
Yes, I am talking about us mere mortals. Or, in other words, the Strava-obsessed bike commuters, weekend warriors and pedal-powered masses.
For those unfamiliar with the wonders of Strava, it is a social networking app used for tracking physical exercise such as walking, running, swimming and cycling.
As well as being used to record routes and chart progress, there is a feature called “segments” where everyone can compete to be the fastest over a given distance, be it a climb or a tricky stretch of trail.
It is meant to encourage healthy competition (or not so healthy, given how seriously it is taken by some) and can be a good way to challenge yourself to get fitter and stronger.
In cycling, the fastest men and women riders are awarded the title of king of the mountains (KOM) and queen of the mountains (QOM) respectively.
These are also known colloquially as “crowns” and there are few things Strava aficionados fear more than the dreaded “uh oh!” email dropping into their inbox to announce they have been “dethroned” from the top of the rankings.
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A couple of Sundays ago I was happily pedalling along my usual cycling route when I spotted a group of riders dressed in orange and black kit. A few moments later a car painted in similar colours passed by. It was some of the Netherlands team out on a training ride.
I was thrilled to bits. And then my brain clicked into gear. “Uh oh…” Did that mean my local Strava segments - where I hold the QOMs - were in peril? Yep… They sure were.
The next day I got a notification. “Uh oh!” And there it was. Dutch rider Shirin van Anrooij had posted a blistering time to take the crown.
Rather than being disappointed I was oddly delighted. If you are going to lose a QOM to anyone it might as well be to a multiple world and European under-23 champion who isn’t shy about traversing the potholed roads of a Lanarkshire industrial estate.
As it happened van Anrooij later added to her spoils of victory with an impressive silver medal in the under-23 women’s road race last weekend.
There have been grumbles in some quarters of social media that Strava segments are now out of reach for the average cyclist. Which smacks of the sourest of sour grapes. But, for the most part, folk are enjoying seeing themselves listed next to the big global names of the sport.
Someone has even created a segment in honour of the location where Dutch star Mathieu van der Poel took a comfort break during the unscheduled stoppage of the 2023 men's road race, before going on to win the rainbow jersey.
The stretch, near the Carron Valley Reservoir, is titled: “Van der Poel sh@t here August 2023” At time of going to press, Italian cyclist Kristian Sbaragli holds the KOM (covering the 1.57km distance in one minute and 50 seconds at a rapid 51.4 km/h).
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As for me? I had hours of fun. Such as realising that reigning Australian road race champion Brodie Mai Chapman had been zipping up the nearby cycle path past the big Lidl warehouse (I held onto one segment but dropped down the rankings in another).
Then came the big guns: Netherlands powerhouses Marianne Vos and Annemiek van Vleuten, who between them hold myriad Olympic, world and European golds. A training ride saw them come within three seconds of nabbing one of my QOMs.
I am not going to lie, there is something kind of cool about seeing my name up there next to two of the all-time greatest riders. A friend said I should frame it. I might just do that. At the very least I’ll treasure that leaderboard screenshot forever.
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