It is possible, despite all shouting to the contrary, to hold two seemingly contradictory opinions in one's head at any one time.
And so, before getting into any nitty gritty about council tax, I have to make it very clear up front that I'm not some tax-averse scallywag who doesn't see the benefit or, dare I say, privilege involved in being able to fiscally contribute to society.
I do. I'm all over it. I pay my fair share, I pay it happily. That's right, there is a but coming.
But council tax is an ossified, outdated, unfair system and any time the Scottish Government comes creeping out of its cave with its half-baked, half-cocked nonsense about making the system fairer, you will find me out on the street with my placard, bawling.
When the government press release on the new council tax consultation landed in my inbox on Wednesday I nearly suffered a head explosion.
Does anyone else remember an SNP manifesto pledge to meaningfully sort out the council tax system? Well, I do. You have to stretch your memory back to 2007 when the party pledged to scrap council tax if it took government.
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Nothing happened, other than a consultation on and subsequent raising of the amount paid by those in properties in bands E to G. The consultation, in 2016, was a bit of a damp squib. Fewer than 30 responses were received and the government was able to make some toot-tooting on a job well done.
The Scottish Greens had also supported abolition of council tax so here was some hope - surely when they entered government they'd give the lads a bit of a push on the issue?
Apparently not, because here we are again. A consultation has now opened on increasing the amount paid by people living in band E to G homes.
"This aims to address criticism that the system is unfair," reads the press release, "because at present those in the lower bands pay a higher proportion of the value of their property than those in the higher bands."
Sounds good on paper. It is, of course, unfair that folk in the lower bands paid proportionally more than those in the higher bands. But... how do we know?
The system is unfair for many reasons but it can never be equitable until properties across the country are re-banded. The banding system is an inequitable guddle. I mean, it must make sense to someone somewhere but I'm damned if I can put two and two together.
If I look at my own property - yes, I have a vested interest here - it's a small new build flat in one of Scotland's most deprived areas. I bought it in 2011 for £87,000 (it's now worth about £110,000). Looking at the flat's history, it was last sold in 2002 for £68,000. A tenement flat on the next street - far more spacious - sold in 2001 for £75,000. That flat is a band B while mine was banded E, as were the rest in my block. On the next street the flats vary from B to C.
My friend just bought an older two-bed property for £190,000 - it's band D. Another friend, who lives near me, has a five bedroom tenement duplex worth £260,000 - it's a band D.
Another is in a flat of the same value as mine and is a band A, inexplicably.
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When I asked an assessor about this he said that tenement flats tend to be in lower bands because they can be accurately valued at their 1991 worth. New builds tend to be bumped into a higher banding because the property value is based on an estimate.
Around 400,000 properties in Scotland and England are estimated to be in the wrong bands but it's a surprise that it's that few.
It's difficult to accept an argument that it is fair that I, a single woman living alone in a flat worth £110,000, should pay an increase in council tax when a family of three, for example, living in a £260,000 property will not.
But Public Finance Minister Tom Arthur disagrees. He says: "We have listened to calls for the council tax system to be made fairer." Katie Hagmann of COSLA, backs him up: "A fairer and more progressive council tax is what the proposals in this consultation aim to do...so that householders pay their fair share."
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The government's missive ends: "Even with the proposed increases taken into account, the average Band E to G charge would still be lower in Scotland than in England."
I don't give a fig, mate. The tree where my figs grow is barren. I'm being robbed by the state but hey! It's fine because at least I'm paying less than I would if I hypothetically moved to a different country.
When I complained about this on Twitter an academic suggested, somewhat waspishly, that I talk to the council's welfare services if I felt I couldn't afford the extra money.
Again, I'm very fortunate that, for me, it's not about ability to pay. Few people are happy to pay higher taxes and we tend to have a blinkered notion when it comes to coughing up. We might believe that higher taxes should apply, but only to people a little bit richer than we are. That is not the nature of my complaint.
It is the fact the system is a blunt tool that overcharges and undercharges at random, and, particularly now, at a time when councils are under extreme financial pressure and a piecemeal approach is not going to provide communities with the services they need.
While the Scottish Government points out that 75% of homes are in Band A to D, research by the think tank IPPR Scotland shows a sizeable share of lower income households live in bands E to H.
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At the time council tax was implemented there was a correlation between property value and income but this is far less the case now.
At the same time as the council tax consultation is running a consultation to allow local authorities to charge a tourist tax is open. Tax raising powers for councils are vital but, again, this is tinkering while local services burn. It would be a good development for our cities but how much will North Lanarkshire gain from a tourist tax? (No offence) Either abolishing council tax for a new system, preferably one of local income tax, or moving to a proportional property tax are the only correct and progressive ways forward.
To do either of these things would be time consuming and so, yes, more immediate solutions are needed.
It would be far less galling for the Scottish Government to announce its repeat of plans to raise the top tax bands if it was doing it against a backdrop of increases being a stopgap while a system without so many nonsensical anomalies and incoherence is developed.
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There's no hope of that yet, though, as Mr Arthur has told MSPs that any reform of a new council tax system is parked until after the 2026 Holyrood election.
This seems almost wilfully unwise - a route map to a new local tax system would be a vote winner... if anyone could trust the SNP to actually implement it.
Council tax was a quick fix to replace poll tax and help the Conservatives in the run up to the 1992 election; it wasn't a long term plan. We've been left with an inequitable property tax system introduced by the Tories and it is to the SNP's shame that it has allowed this regressive tax to live on.
That's a lot to fit on my placard but, if you'll excuse me, I'm away to wave it.
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