THE new Labour Government will instigate many fresh policies, though the traditions of Parliament remain the same, such as the King’s Speech, delivered yesterday. Reader Lauren Deane was attempting to explain the significance of this important ritual to her 11-year-old son ...
THE England footy team did well to reach the Euro 24 final, as we’ve previously mentioned. Scotland can also be proud… um, we’re not sure how to complete this sentence.
The Scottish nation has not quite exhausted its expressions of sympathy with its southern neighbour after Sunday’s disappointing football result.
The most fervent desire of the citizens of Scotia has been that one day – one miraculous day! – our English neighbours would stop blethering on about 1966, and all that. It seems that we’re about to get our wish, because the boastful bunch from beyond Hadrian’s Wall could soon be replacing ’66 with ’24 as their only topic of conversation.
We mentioned a poor wee chap who once got belted in primary school for the heinous crime of flipping a page in a text book with his tongue...
The Diary continues to be the premier forum for the most vexing philosophical questions of our times. Reader Duncan Stevenson gets in touch to ask: “Why is it only one jacket – singular – but it’s a pair of trousers?”
Reader Paul Stewart tells us that his teenage son, Steve, is a fan of the blood-thirsty computer game Grand Theft Auto (GTA), which focuses on the criminal exploits of fictional American gangsters. The other day Paul’s dad visited, and he tried to encourage Steve to quit playing GTA and take up a more sedate pastime, such as dominoes.
Researchers have discovered that the hippopotamus can become airborne for substantial periods of time. The Diary hasn’t yet ascertained what "substantial" means in this context.
The generous denizens of Scotia are, of course, delighted for their neighbours, and are encouraging the players to continue booting the ball around the park in the dazzling style that has already put more people to sleep than a cushioned rocking-chair in front of a crackling hearth.
SO we got through the painful process together, yet again. Nonsense was talked, questions about the nation’s future were left unanswered, ballot papers were counted, and miraculously, we haven’t ended up with Donald Trump, Joe Biden or Kim Jong Un being given the keys to Number 10.
